Monday, March 29, 2010


1. There is no such thing as a free lunch.
Observation: Unless you have a coupon for a free lunch.

2. An apple a day keeps the doctor away.
Observation: Especially if you throw it at him.

3. Don’t count your chickens before they’re hatched.
Observation: Those are called eggs. Can I count my eggs?

4. Better late than never.
Observation: Doesn’t work too well if your parachute opens really late.

5. It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity.
Observation: But it’s also the heat.

6. You can’t judge a book by its cover.
Observation: Unless you are trying to judge the cover.

7. She is burning her candle at both ends.
Observation: Maybe she wants more light.

8. Nice guys finish last.
Observation: Bad guys don’t care if she finishes at all.

9. Go the extra mile.
Observation: Unless you are already there, of course.

10. You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink.
Observation: You won’t have to. It’ll drink when it’s thirsty.